Wednesday, November 25, 2015

What's The Weirdest Thing You've Ever Eaten?

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving!  Meaning that all across the country, Americans are getting psyched and ready to stuff their faces full of holiday foods and I'm over here making you lose your appetites.

All my life I've sworn "I will never eat bugs!"  I also said I'd never do a lot of things that I definitely did, and peer pressure entered into the picture, and, well...

My boyfriend ordered live crickets off the Internet (if it's possible on the Internet, my boyfriend has already done it), and his friend cooked them up.  They were both drinking to warm up to the experience, but I was on an antibiotic and went into it cold sober.  What do they taste like?  Roasted chickpeas, honestly.  Not bad.  I didn't like the legs, though.  I would be open to using cricket flour as a gluten-free replacement:  Cricket madelienes!  Cricket pizza dough!  Cricket cupcakes!  CriCupCakes?  We'll have to see.

What was the weirdest thing you've ever eaten?  Have you eaten bugs?  Live squid?  Exotic foods?  TELL ME in the comments!  And sorry in advance for spoiling your Thanksgiving dinner.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

5 Blogging Tips I Begrudgingly Like (Just Don't Make A Big Thing Out Of It)

If you're like me, you're probably thinking "guh! Not another pedantic blog about blogging!But come on, would I play you like that?  That's how I feel every time someone tells me to "advertise my posts on Twitter and Instagram!" like, I know I'm old but I do know what a Twitter isAmidst the sea of well-meaning but often redundant advise, five things have stood out to me as being useful:

Consistent profile pic across all social media accounts  How many times has this happened to you?  Perusing blog posts, you find one that's so hilarious, so true, so unique, you have to learn more!  You try to follow them on Twitter...only to find there's 5 users with her name and their profile pics are all photos of cats.  You feel like you've been set up on a blind date by friends and you're wandering around the bar like "I'm looking for Sarah?  She's a blonde?  She has a blog?  Excuse me, are you Sarah the funny blonde blogger who wrote the post about cats wearing socks?"  Keeping the profile pictures consistent makes it easier to find you.  I want to find you!  I want to find and follow you!  So stop playing hard-to-get, Cat Socks Sarah!

Know Your Niche!  Oh I used to rail against the "niche" edict ... until I started thinking of blogs as magazines.  Makes sense, doesn't it?  Your blog is like a magazine where YOU are the editor, YOU are the photographer, YOU are the writer, and YOU are in charge of writing up the advertising!  PHEW!  It's a lot of work, and you want to sell issues, I mean, gain followers, right?  Now imagine walking into the magazine shop and picking up an issue of Vogue.  You open it up to find 4 photo spreads and 38 articles on Motorcycle Maintenance.  WTF, Vogue?!?  In that case, Vogue totally abandons its niche and I'm probably going to stop reading it.

...But That Doesn't Mean "Don't Try New Things!"  Having a niche doesn't mean all your posts are exactly the same!  You gotta do you, in the end.  Back to the magazine metaphor!  Know what feels right for you, but don't be afraid to write that article on motorcycle maintenance if you're just dying to!  Who knows, maybe you'll tap into a market of Fashionable Biker Babes who want fashion spreads and Harley tips? 

Comment and Comment Alike 
Instant Karma's gonna get you!  The Golden Rule of Blogging:  if you want comments, leave a comment!  Every time I get a comment, I check out the commenter's blog, and I usually leave a comment over there, too!  I got into blogging to meet people and hear their stories, so leave a comment and introduce yourself, and we all shine on

Let me see it!!  I have found so many interesting folks on Twitter only to navigate to their blog I looking at it?  What size font is that, 4??  I guess I don't understand the point of pouring your heart out to your blog, or dashing off brilliant, witty ideas, and then making them so small nobody can read them.  SING OUT, Tina Tiny-Type!  I know I've unfollowed at least 5 blogs in the past because they've "redesigned" and changed their post font to microscopic light gray script and I'm sorry, ain't nobody got time for that.  I'm not gonna haul out my Rosetta Stone to decript what you just said, I'm not going to hit Ctrl+ five times every time you show up in my Bloglovin' feed, I'm just not.  Bye gurl.

Cuz if your blog font does this to my eyes I WILL NOT BE following you on Bloglovin' ya feel me?

Monday, November 23, 2015

Which Thanksgiving Food Are You?

1.  What do you wear to Thanksgiving Dinner?

A.  Well, if I have time, I'm going to change out of this apron and into a nice outfit.

B.  Call me when the food's ready, I'm still wearing the pajamas I slept in.

C.  Are jeans too casual?  I should wear a shirt with a collar, right?  Do you think they'll like me?

D.  You're kidding, right?  Of course I'm wearing my "Gobble Gobble" Turkey sweater!  Everyone loves it!

2.  What's your least favourite part of the holiday?

A.  All the work *heaviest of heavy sighs*

B.  Tryptophan comas, passing out and missing the last quarter of the game!

C.  Meeting new people, impressing the family, I hope they all like me!

D.  Shops that open on Thanksgiving night for Black Friday.  Hello!  Let people have their holiday!  It's a family time! *sheds a tear*

3.  What are you most looking forward to about Thanksgiving?

A.  All the compliments I'm going to receive on my brilliantly executed feast!

B.  Whuzzat?  I was watchin' the football.

C.  Um, being with people, I guess?  It beats eating dinner by myself.

D.  The family, the traditions, and the kickoff to the Christmas season!  Woohoo!

4.  It's Thanksgiving, so there's gonna be a family feud!  Whose side do you take?

A.  MINE!  This is my dinner, and I'm the one leading this feud!

B.  You mean, which football team am I cheering on, right?

C.  I'm definitely on, uh, what's her name? The one I just met?  Yeah, her side.

D.  Why do we have to fight YOU GUYZ let's just all get along and have a happy holiday!!

5.  What are your after-dinner plans?

A.  Well, I have to finish carving the turkey and making the take-home leftover boxes for everyone...

B.  Couch.  Football.  Sleep.

C.  So, uh, I guess I'll make conversation? Um, what do you do?

D.  I'll help with dishes!  Can I get anyone a drink?  Oooh it's DESSERT TIME!


If you answered mostly A's, you're the Turkey! 

Thanksgiving dinner is all about YOU and yeah, you know it.  As the star of this whole meal, you're getting to be kind of a diva about it.  You're stuffed, alright - full of yourself.  Relax a bit, it's just a holiday, and holidays are supposed to be fun, right?

If you answered mostly B's, you're Mashed Potato

The rest of the year, you're just a couch potato, but during the Holiday season, you're the mashed potatoes.  Hey!  Eyes off the TV, I'm talking to you!  You are barely even aware of the holiday season, as long as it coincides with Football season.  Could you at least load the dishwasher or something?  Turkey is mad at you for not helping, in case you haven't noticed.  Big surprise, you haven't noticed.  We'll deal with this after the Super Bowl, I guess.

If you answered mostly C's, you're the Casserole!

Let's get real: you're only here because someone brought you to be nice.  It's weird for you, it's weird for everybody, we get that.  Maybe you're dating someone at the meal, maybe you're made of quinoa, maybe your family lives too far away for you to visit, maybe you're veganWhatever.  We're all just going to be polite and not make this weirder than it has to be.

If you answered mostly D's, you're Pumpkin Pie!

Aww, aren't you
sweet?  Without you, this dinner would be a disaster.  You're feeding Turkey's ego with much-needed compliments, making the Casserole feel included and less awkward, and politely ignoring Mashed Potatoes unlacing his sweatpants at the dinner table.  You're having a good time, and that's the most important thing.  You're such a fabulous addition to the Thanksgiving dinner table, we're thinking of having you back for Christmas as well.  Thanks for being such a sweetie!

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Sunday Stealing: Would You Rather Meme

    Hi Sunday Stealers!  Hope your weeks have been warm, minimally snowy, and productive!  I'm hoping to install shelving this weekend - so I apologize if this is dashed off quick, but I'm taking measurements and blah blah blah I gotta run, let's do some stealing!

    Would you rather be stuck on an island alone or with someone who talks incessantly?
    I'll take "talks incessantly" because that person is actually me.  I'd rather that than have awkward silences.

    Would you rather be too hot or too cold?
    I guess cold, because you can always bundle up, but you can't really bundle down.

    Would you rather have a cook or a maid?
    I'll take the cook, because I don't mind either, but would love fancy foods.

    Would you rather be the youngest or the oldest sibling?
    Youngest.  I am the oldest, and am thus the subject of much scrutiny.  Best to be the middle child, I think.  You get to coast by, unnoticed.

    Would you rather get rich through hard work or through winning the lottery?
    Uhhh, winning the lottery I think?  I don't really see myself working my way to riches anytime soon.

    Would you rather have a 10-hour dinner with a headstrong politician from an opposing party,or attend a 10-hour concert for a music group you detest? 
    I'll take Trump.  I mean, the politician.  At the very least, that would be entertaining.

    Would you rather be an Olympic gold medalist or a Nobel Peace Prize winner?
    Aw hell yeah Nobel Prize!

    Would you rather have a desk job or an outdoor job?
    I already work outdoors, so my other job would be a desk job.  I could have a cubicle!  And coworkers!  And a water cooler!  Nah, already over it.

    Would you rather live at the top of a tall NYC apartment building or at the top of a mountain? 
    I'll take the building.

    Would you rather have Rambo or The Terminator on your side? 
    Ummm the Terminator I guess?  At least I've seen those movies.

    Would you rather be proposed to in private or in front of family and friends? 
    In private.

    Would you rather have to sew all your clothes or grow your own food? 
    I think it would be FUN to sew all my clothes!  

    Would you rather hear the good news or the bad news first? 
    Bad news first...but tell me the good news is coming!

    Would you rather be your own boss or work for someone else? 
    I'd rather be my own boss.

    Would you rather have nosy neighbors or noisy neighbors?
    Nosy would be so much better than noisy.  But I live in New York, so noisy neighbors are much more common!!!

    Would you rather be on a survival reality show or dating game show?
    I'll take the dating show!  I'm an expert on those!!!

    Would you rather be too busy or be bored?
    Too busy.  More entertaining.

    Would you rather watch the big game at home or live at the stadium? 
    I'm not a big sports fan but I think it would be more fun to go to a stadium, if I gotta pick.

    Would you rather spend the day with your favorite athlete or you favorite movie star?
    Well since I don't know of ANY athletes, I'll go with movie star?

    Would you rather live where it is constantly winter or where it is constantly summer?
    In defiance of my "too cold" answer, I'll take constant summer! 

Saturday, November 21, 2015

25 Pet Peeves

Oh, boy, did I unload here!  Let's get to it:  Darling Stewie (that's her blog name and me being jocundly affectionate) posted a list of 25 Pet Peeves as a "Doggy Bag" post!  So I drank two Frangelicos, lit some incense, and purged my 25 biggest pet peeves out into this disasterpiece.  It's dark!  Political!  Offensive!  Soooo.... ENJOY!

1.  When people confuse "throwing shade" with "being an asshole."  Throwing shade is an art, and it's clever.  Any idiot can burp out "lol ur fat".  Clever people throw shade.  Need reference?  Read Oscar Wilde.  Then practice in the mirror.  Awwww, snap!

2.  It's "should have" not "should of" = should've.  ("HAVE."  That's where the "-ve" comes from!)

3.  Just B-R-E-A-T-H-E.  If you just "remember to breath," you'll only inhale once, and you'll lose oxygen, and DIE.  Please remember to breathe, don't just breath.

4.  The term "ba
sic bitch" (excellent post here on femnasty) is insulting to yourself and a microaggression to other women so please stop calling people (and yourself) basic.  You're not basic.  You're a miracle of chance and evolution.  I believe in you!!!

5.  This:  "Feminists aren't all fat, ugly lesbians!"  Because some feminists are lesbians.  Some feminists are fat.  And "ugly"?  Please.  Since when do only the thin, gorgeous, heterosexual feminists mattered?  Feminism isn't a beauty contest or a dating show.  Google it.

6.  Why is it always when you're sick and puking, when you're at your most vulnerable and nauseous, that you truly realize how revoltingly filthy your bathroom is?  My bathroom, as a rule, is fastidiously tidy (it's the size of a shoebox, la, New York) and yet when I'm feeling queasy, I kneel in front of the toilet to vomit, and I'm assaulted by the hidden filth that is my commode?  Not cool, potty, not cool.

7.  When Haterz try to troll me but their grammar and spelling are so bad that I... think that's supposed to be an insult?  I almost feel bad blocking them on Twitter because I justify their nonsense by, I dunno, maybe they left their laptop open and their cat walked across it.  Frankly, that makes more sense than imagining a cognizant human being formulated the missive I received.  Block!

8.  People misusing the phrase "Netflix & chill".  Okay, maybe you guys don't have the internet, so I'm gonna cup my hand to my mouth and say this loud enough for you to hear:  "Netflix & chill" means inviting someone to your home for casual sex!!  Got that?  Okay, moving on.

9.  Reducing the conversation about abortion to situations involving rape and health of the mother.  Abortion is legal regardless of circumstancesWomen don't have to explain themselves.  They don't need your approval.  They need control of their lives.  Thanks, abortion, for giving women control over their lives!

10.  Why do leggings come up to my chin in the front, yet slide down over my ass when I bend over?  Are they made wrong?  OR AM I?

11.  People who follow you on social media to get a follow back, then unfollow you a day later.  That's fine I didn't want your fair-weather follow anyway!  Ummm....what?  I don't even know you and already our relationship is predicated on an ultimatum of mutual codependency?

12.  People who treat cashiers like servants.  'Nuff said.

13.  The tense hostage negotiations that take place inside your head when your ice cube is stuck to the bottom of your glass:  "I'm just going to take a little sip then...maybe a bigger, it's really stuck on there!  Bigger sip?... The glass is now completely upside down, that ice cube isn't going anywhere, might as well finish off this drink!"  And then that bastard ice cube comes loose and SMACKS YOU IN THE EYE.  People, please.  I can't be the only one.

14.  People who "like" but don't retweet.  Come on.  Why so proud?  Retweets are free, Scrooge McDuck.  Retweets are like smiles, you have an infinite supply, and they make everyone happy.  Please, suh, can I have so more retweets?

15.  The automatic assumption that all human beings are on diets.  "Want me to wrap that up?"  "Can we splurge on dessert?"  "You can afford to eat that!"  NO, I'm still eating it, YES, I'll look at the dessert menu if I want and SHUT UP, I'm full.  I'm an adult human being and it's taken me a long time to learn how to feed myself thanks to this idiotic diet talk.  Food is not a battlefield, so top shimmying at me, Pat Benatar. 

16.  When you're talking to a stranger about something innocuous like the weather or the mime troupe performance and then he BAM!  Asks you on a date out of the blue (WTF?) and you're like "No?" and he runs away leaving you stunnedLike this!:

17.  Bars that don't have menus.  Walk up to the bar and bartender is like "What can I get you?" and you be like "Ummm....I don't know.  Can I have a Frangelico?"  "No, we don't have that."  "Well, how about a Pimm's cup?"  "How do you make those?"  "Do you have any wine, at least?"  "We don't serve wine, just beer and cocktails."  "...could you elaborate, please?The worst is when they get annoyed at that like, "Hey, man, I'm not the one who's unprepared for this interaction, you are."  But then I usually order a rum & coke and drink it in spite.

18.  The phrase "I'm not like other girls."  This phrase should only be used tongue-in-cheek when alluding to superpowers (Buffy Summers and Alex Mack, you're o-kay!).  Otherwise, I bet dollars to donuts I can find you another girl who likes football/drinks whiskey/hates pink/smokes cigars/wears pants/can't execute flawless winged eyeliner.  Your move, special snowflake.

19.  When people claim not to understand how sexuality can be "fluid," when in fact the only gay person they know is their uncle who was married before and had two kids with a woman but decided to live his truth and divorced in his 40's to date men.  I'm not even going to explain this one, I'm going to make a face and let you try to figure it out.

20.  When people react to me saying "Oh I don't eat gluten," by giving me a fifteen-minute lecture on food allergies, the latest research, Dr. Oz's opinion, his cousin who was "cured of Celiac" by doing yoga and taking vitamin D, and rounding it out with a quote from Franklin D. Roosevelt. story bro, I still don't want any pretzels.  Pass me the potato chips though?  Thanks.

21.  Party conversations that start with "What do you do?"  I really don't have a good reason for this one, I just find it soo tempting to lie"I'm a scented-candle sniffer." or "I'm a nail polish colour namer." or "I'm a foot fetish model." or "I run an international drug-smuggling ring." or "I'm a spy from a Martian civilization disguised as a work in accounting?  Wow, that's so fascinating."

22.  When cis-gender people say "I don't understand trans / non-binary people."  I don't understand what it's like to be an 80-year-old grandmother living in Norway, but that doesn't mean I think all Norwegian grannies are LYING ABOUT THEIR IDENTITY!!!  "Oh, you've got three granddaughters and one on the way, Hilde?  Are you sure?  Maybe you're just confused."

23.  I hate it when my upper lip is sticky.  Because of this, it has been years since my last lollipop.  Cue the sad violin.

24.  Men's Pants vs. Women's Pants.  Can someone finally please explain to me why men's pants are simple and direct and women's pants need a Rosetta stone to figure out what size you are?

25.  Finally, I hate when people take themselves too seriously.  Crack a smile.  It's all a joke.  It's only temporary, don't worry, it's almost over and guess what?  "Do Not Take Life Too Seriously -- You Will Never Get Out Of It Alive!"

Wow.  Let's just say, it sometimes went to a dark place.  And, I had some major technical difficulties composing this post towards the end.  But, as we know, I love a friendly debate, so if I said anything that sparked a bee in your bonnet, let me know in the comments!  Or, if you'd like, write your own Pet Peeves post and link me to it!  I'd love to see what everyone comes up with!

Friday, November 20, 2015

5 Fandom Friday: 5 Reasons I'm Thankful for Blogging

This week's 5 Fandom Friday topic is "Fandoms You're Thankful For" but the only fandom community I could think of was this one:  The Blogging Community.  We have our inside jokes, our struggles, our cliches, and our unique culture.  I knew I wanted to write a Thanksgiving post about the wonderful love and support this community and this hobby have given to me.  This is my 1700th post, y'all!  Can you believe it?  That's a loooong haul!!

1.  Blogging makes me feel good!
  when I sit down with my laptop, things come easily to me.  Everything else I've ever tried to do was frustrating or demeaning, but I've always been able to come back to my drafts, put my heart out there, and feel so proud to hit "publish." 

2.  I love reading other blogs! 
finding a blog I love to read is better than finding a magazine I love, or a TV show to binge.  I shamelessly spend hours reading archives.  Sometimes I'll go back to the first post and devour an entire blog in total.

3.  My readers are the greatest!  The comments that I get - oh, I love comments - are smart, thoughtful, and interesting.  I love starting discussions and sparking conversations about the topics I present.  That's the whole point, isn't it?

4.  Blogger chats on Twitter give me life!  Bloggers can be so funny, we have lots in common, and it's a great way to meet new people (and then stalk their blog!) with ideas and helpful hints.  Since I've joined in chats this summer, loads of new opportunities have opened up and I've "met" so many great folks who all encourage each other to do their best!

5.  I love having all my memories on here!
  I love seeing posts from the past pop up to see what my life was like years ago.  I love that there's a record of my past:  what my life was like, where I've been, the good and the bad.  This record fulfills the lifelong dream of having a consistent diary (which I've never managed to successfully stick to).

So thank you all, because without you and YOUR blogs, this wouldn't be nearly as fun.  Best wishes and Happy Holidays, all!

Thursday, November 19, 2015

What Was Your First Drink?

When you were a toddler, your parents might have slipped you sips of beer, or let you taste the champagne at a wedding, but I want to know:  what was your first "real" alcoholic beverage like?  How old were you?  Did you like it?

I was a few months shy of my 21st birthday (therefore UNDERAGE) and hanging out with some friends at their house who were all over 21, all drinking.  They convinced me to try some, and I was nervous about getting drunk (off one drink!) but figured it would help along the aspirin I'd taken for a headache.  Kids At Home, Don't Do What I Did!  I was mixing pills and liquor, and I was headed for disaster

They mixed me A SHOT of Ginger Ale with a splash of Watermelon Pucker in it, and I sipped it slowly over the course of an hour.  I didn't care for it much, because the Ginger Ale was stale and flat.  I fell asleep ( ! ) while we were all watching an anime (Chobits!) together, and woke up to my friends teasing me because I had "passed out drunk!" 

I remember driving home paranoid as hell, going exactly the speed limit, afraid that if I got pulled over, I'd get in trouble for "drinking and driving underage"!  Oh, I was such a cautious and scared little teenager...funny how things work out!

Okay, sound off:  did you wait until you could drink legally, or sneak a drink underage like me?  Were you unimpressed, as I was, or was it love at first sip?  Extra points if the story is adorable, embarrassing, OR BOTH!

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

The Twelve Freakouts of Christmas, pt. 1

For the First Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me:  The Window Displays Freakout

"I'm still hung over from Halloween!  I'm not ready to deal with this shit!  I don't have plans for Thanksgiving yet, and I haven't even accomplished one of my New Year's Resolutions!  I rebuke thee, Santa!"

For the 2nd Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me:  The This Is My Jingle Bell Jam! Freakout

"Mariah Carey is A GENIUS.  This is song is literally about me!  I'm feeling so many feelings right now, I just wish it could be Christmas ALL the time!  Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell FUCK YEAH!"

For the 3rd Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me:  The Too-Many Thanksgiving Dinner Invitations Freakout

"My dad's invited me up, my brother is hosting upstate, my aunt wants to know my plans, and I don't even know what your family has in mind!  Forget it!  I'm staying home with the parade and making a Marie Calendar's frozen dinner for myself.  I just can't be in that many places at once!"

For the 4th Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me:  The Holiday Food Issues Freakout (Thanksgiving Day)

"Yeah, so I've been a vegan for 17 years, but I guess I'll have some turkey!  I don't want to insult the chef, haha!  Oh my gluten allergy!  Yeah, it's not so serious, I just throw up like Linda Blair from the exorcist if a single speck of flour lands in my food but what the hell!  It's the holidays, right?  They have bathrooms on MetroNorth trains, don't they?!  Actually, you know what I can eat?  WINE!  I'll take seconds!  Haha!  Happy Thanksgiving!  Pass the Epi-Pen!"

For the 5th Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me:  The Black Friday Freakout

"I said I wasn't going to do this again this yearHow could I let you talk me in to going to the mall on Black Friday?  You're not getting anything for Christmas this year, you realize that?  This?  Right here?  Me?  In a Wal-Mart at 5am?  This is your present.  Take a picture of this bruise I got from the lady who rammed me with her cart to get the last Elmo doll in the county.  This is all you're getting.  Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals."

For the 6th Christmas Freakout My True Love Gave to Me:  The My-Way-Or-The-Highway Freakout

"The John Lewis ad wasn't sad enough!  The Starbucks Christmas cups aren't merry enough!  The Mall Santa isn't jolly enough!  This isn't what I wanted!  Why didn't anyone consult me about this?!?" be continued!!!

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Staged Photos on Social Media

Dear Blogging Community,

It has come to my attention that several members of our social media circle have been accused of staging photos.  I, for one, am shocked.  As you can see from my unstaged, unfiltered reaction photo above.  That's real life, people!  Excuse me, I'm so rattled, I need to go for a walk before I can even deal with this:

Phew!  That's better.

That certain bloggers would stoop to the unconscionable level of applying filters to their photos, cropping out undesirable portions, taking a shower, even smiling, all just for a photograph!  Honestly, I didn't even consider staging photos as an option.

When you look at my Instagrams, you only see my real, honest self, being humble and normal and totally boring, as nature and Instagram intended.  You see, I hang out in front of ordinary walls, just like regular folk!

I'm not out desperately seeking attention by buying coffee cups at trendy and popular coffee shops just to take a photo to share for the attention.  I drink my coffee at home, in a humble Mason jar, in the foreground of a seasonal decorative gourd, just like common people do!

My life isn't glamorous at all, as you can plainly see!  Most days involve running monotonous errands, such as grocery shopping and laundry:

And when I do have the time to enjoy myself, I'm not chasing down celebrities in the club like some attention-craving fame-monger.  No, I'm far more likely to be curled up at home, with a book, in totally understated and ordinary fashion, definitely not staging any photos:

So if you're like me, a totally normal human being who just to happens to have an Instagram account, and you're sick to death of all these fakers posing for pictures and smiling like the Miley Cyrus Kendall Jenner wannabes they are, follow my Instagram account for raw, unadulterated and definitely never staged photos. 

Because I'm one of you...common people.
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