Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Movie Review - New York, I Love You

This movie doesn't make any sense - strangers don't talk to each other in NYC.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Haiku: Ode to Pandora Boxx

Nooooo, Pandora Boxx!!!
You're still a winner to me.
You were my fav'rite!!!

10 Things I Hate About You: The Television Show

It's a television series, loosely based on a movie, loosely based on a Shakespeare play.

From the people who brought you True Life: I Couldn't Come Up With An Original Idea To Save My Life.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Movie Review - The Invention of Lying

It honestly takes Jennifer Garner 1 hour and 31 minutes to overcome her crippling shallowness.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Forget Public Humiliation, Make Yourself Over!

Instead of going on TLC's What Not To Wear...

1. Throw out all your clothes.

2. Cut your hair into an angular bob

3. Put on a wrap dress, red heels, and grab a purse that doesn't match anything you have on.

4. Flagellate yourself.

5. Assemble all your friends and family to celebrate the fact that you did the above.

If They're Not Going To ACTUALLY Play Music Videos Anymore...

TRANSform Me is the greatest thing to happen to VH1 since they decided they all loved the past three decades.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Haiku: Ode to Miley Cyrus

Hi, Miley Cyrus
You look like a wildebeast
Why do I hate you?

America- 1, Britain - 0

Conversation between self and British person, trying to justify the term "jumper", meaning "sweater":

British person: "Why do you call them sweaters? When you put them on, do you immediately start to sweat?"

Me: "Sometimes. When YOU put them on, do you instantly start to jump?"

Kate Gosselin is SUCH a Good Mom...

"A five-year-old should not know the word 'papparazzi'. That's just not normal."

(But having 8 kids and then pimping them out to TV for money is just common parenting sense)

What We Learn From "The Learning Channel"

TLC Programming Breakdown

Midgets Making Cakes
Big Families
Insanely Big Families
Real Estate
Makeover Shows
Midgets Getting Makeovers
Revoltingly Big Families

"Did you see what she was wearing? She was asking for it!"

engrish funny call chunkily
see more Engrish

That's True Love

funny pictures of dogs with captions
see more dog and puppy pictures

Monday, March 8, 2010

Make THESE Children's Stories Into Hollywood Movies!!!!

Caps for Sale

Goodnight, Moon

Oh! The Places You'll Go

Heather Has Two Mommies

The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales

Everybody Poops
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